1st Annual Anya Foundation Tournament

Orange County Register

May 8, 2003

Remembering Anya

Author:
JOHN REGER

The cord that holds multiple pictures of his daughter, Anya, hangs in the middle of his shirt above his belly button, but it is much closer to his heart than people realize.

It is the only thing on Tom Lazare that isn't black, so it stands out from a long-sleeved black polo shirt and matching slacks and shoes. Black is the only color he will ever wear again, he says, to serve as a constant reminder of a little girl who died.

Also a reminder, he hopes, is the golf tournament he and his wife, Sheryl, founded this year. The Anya Foundation Junior Championship, started with the Southern California PGA Foundation, was held Saturday and Sunday at Tustin Ranch Golf Club.

Lazare was a constant swirl of activity on the weekend, running from one spot to another, answering questions from parents, adjusting the trophies on a table and pointing children to where the food is, the chain swaying back and forth with every movement.

Lazare always knows it's there. When he sits, his hands unconsciously go to it, touching it while he talks. Above the pictures are little dandelions he has tied to the cord.

"When she was less than a year old, she would see this flower and pick it up and she give it to me,'' Lazare said. "I kept the first one she gave me. I was putting them away, and my mind was thinking, when she gets married I could give them to her and say, 'These flowers plus a thousand others for your wedding. This is the first flower you gave me.' '' Lazare never got the chance. Anya died May 3, 2002. She was three days shy of 17 months old.

The family had been at a local hardware store and was unpacking the car. Lazare was watering the front lawn of their Villa Park home. The other three children, Sabrina, 15, Lyon, 12, and Foya, 9, were in the house with their mother.

"Somehow, she went through the garage, past the mess, past the dog and the one gate wasn't secured,'' Sheryl Lazare said. "She went right past it. She was smart.''

Anya fell into the family pool and drowned.

"We all take life for granted,'' Sheryl said. "We always think, 'Oh, that can't happen to us. We're good parents.' We consider ourselves still good parents. You just have to slow down and pay attention to little details. You're always running around and not appreciating your kids.''

Never is that more evident than at junior golf tournaments. Parents hover around scoreboards, harassing tournament volunteers, while children nervously rock back and forth in chairs, waiting to see whether they will receive a trophy that often is far more important to their parents than to the ones who earned it.

This event was different. Though it was intended to honor Anya Lazare, it also ended up providing a chance for parents to get closer to their kids.

Children were running around playing tag, or eating lunch with their parents, everyone smiling and talking between bites. A family was behind the 18th green taking pictures together. It was more like a picnic than a competition.

"Everybody knows the purpose of this event,'' said Nikki Gatch, director of junior golf for the SCPGA Foundation. "Life is too short, golf is just a game. It is my hope the parents would appreciate this. I think they have.''

It certainly made an impression on one. He picked up literature on pool safety from a table set up by the Drowning Prevention Network. He saw the very pregnant Sheryl Lazare, less than a week from delivering a daughter they have named Lenna.

He shook Sheryl's hand warmly and thanked her for the event, saying he enjoyed being able to caddie for his daughter.

It is the only junior event at which the SCPGA allows caddies. Parents are usually kept a safe distance from their children during competition, but Gatch said this tournament was different.

"I think it should be one of our more popular events,'' Gatch said. "It certainly has had a great first year.''

The Lazares received money and services from several sponsors, including Titleist, Callaway, Pepsi and Tustin Ranch, though they also spent more than $40,000 of their own money.

It showed. There were signs leading up the driveway to the golf course, and the caddies had bibs with the child's name on the back. The $100 entry fee got them two rounds of golf, lunch both days, and a shirt and hat, which most of them wore the second day. There were 144 golfers ages 9-17 and another 150 on the waiting list.

"I've heard so many good things about the tournament,'' Sheryl Lazare said. "They just felt important, instead of just another event. I haven't heard anything negative.''

In addition to the tournament, Tom Lazare has created the Anya Device. It is a monitor that is worn by child and parent and alerts parents when their child is more than 30 feet away. It also beeps when it is submerged in water.

His children wrote songs for their sister. They perform them after the tournament on a black piano near the putting green, bringing a smile to Tom, who has played modern jazz guitar for 30 years.

"It was very devastating to them,'' Sheryl said. "They all handled it a little differently.''

None took it harder than Tom.

"It happened so fast,'' he said. "You have the baby, then you don't. It is very hard. She was my masterpiece. Part of my heart is gone.''

There was a lot of emotion on this Sunday, a year and a day after Anya's death. Tom introduced his children with tears in his eyes and a quivering voice. During the songs, one son in the crowd moved a little closer to his father, who put his arm around him.

On this day, competition finished a distant second.

(714) 796-4942 or
cascribe@aol.com

For more information on the Anya Foundation, visit www.anyafoundation.com

Copyright 2003 The Orange County Register
Record Number: 61884692